Why the title? What’s up with the carbs?
The
answer is simple. I have a BA degree and only the tacky golden arches of US
owned McDonalds offer fries with that.
Get it? And fries they are, thin, tasteless wafers of cardboard poached in the
ill-gotten overused oil derivative from whence whocares. Lets not go there now.
Now the aptly named slap chips found in the Cape are
natures way of saying “baby, transfats may be bad but damn girrrrrl! how can
something this yummo be outlawed?” Surely this vinegary soaked melt in your mouth
yumness is a gift straight from the goddess herself.
But I digress.
Having the combined lethargy of living and
growing up in Cape Town
I also use the fact that I majored in
English to feel that I have earned the right to make up words (such as *bolemify,
which turns the adjective into to verb - meaning to throw up after eating/
reading,) – my poetic license you might say. Bonafide.
After years of indecision and middle class
guilt, I naturally turned to the film industry or, as pasty, pretentious
production managers call it “the industry”. (as
if it’s self important, frenzied, need-this-done-yesterday-ness is what is
keeping
With much fear, trepidation, teeth
gritting, loin girding, and financial support from Dad ( to whom I shall
dedicate this blog as a down payment to the substantial loan) I Jammie shuttled
my way back to UCT;15 years after graduating; to do a Post Grad Certificate in Education[PGCE],
to become ..dun dun dun…a teacher. I've been told by a number of people for
years that I would be an amazing teacher, but I resisted and rallied against it
due to the fact that I loathed school with its petty rules and regulation (nylon)
socks and wanted no part in perpetuating
the rot (my favorite phrase). I hated the smell of school corridors – sort
of a peanut butter meets cheap disinfectant meets vomit stink. I hated the
sound of the bell, even if it occasionally meant we could leave after it, there
were still 11 or so bells before that – signaling us to move from one tired
drudgery to the next. I wanted no part of it.
What changed? Well, I’ve been trying to
figure that out all year. Studying again was fantastic – I took in so much more
than the first time round and actually relished (okay relish is a strong word)
but I took some pleasure in writing essays and attending lectures. People perpetually
ask me “so why did you decide to go into teaching?” and I invariably stutter
out some altruistic catch phrase like – “I get on well with young people” or
“It’s the least I can do to effect real change” blah blah fishpaste. But to be
honest I think I agreed to go into it because it was a) something I am already
half qualified to do, b)I don’t have any other realistic ideas, c) it is
something of a global passport should I ever manage to leave this place and
finally d) I was really quite drunk when I agreed to do it. (not my fault).
So now I’m a teacher. Talk about global
disasteryness. I have to admit though, I kinda dig it. I do in fact get along
well with young people, and that the fact that education in this country is in
such shattered tatters, maybe, just maybe I can
make a difference – even if it’s to one kid at a time. Hells! Is this a whiff
of altruism mixing with the peanut buttery odor that has become my life?
People in the Education industry have
almost as much self importance as in the film industry but this time its really
quite valid – in some instances anyway. Behind the chest puffing, the endless
meetings about meetings, and the implicit hierachry within a school, these
people have made the decision to do one of the most vital of tasks in society –
to educate the youth. Even if one looks at it as a form of artful colonization,
the fact that these people are there, earning what they are (pitifully) means that
there is or was some passion and compassion in their hearts and minds. Hey! Me
too!
It’s really like any other System. You have
to deal with a ton of bureaucratic bullshit before any real change or
progression can be demonstrated, which naturally leads to stagnation and mistrust
in teachers and school administrators. I’ve been teaching for less than a year
now and already I find myself weary and disillusioned. What helps me get up at
such a god-awful time in the morning every day, is the relationships I have
made. I adore my learners. They are not just a sea of vacuous faces waiting to
be fed knowledge. In fact most of them couldn’t give a damn about gaining any
knowledge at all – but I have made an (initially unconscious) effort to know
them individually, to have a relationship with them that goes beyond school and
overdue essays and DT’s.
I worry a lot that this may be a ridiculously
naive approach which could lead to either me burning out completely after a
year or two ; or the learners literally treating me only as a peer and not
someone they should respect, who is worthy to be learned from. And shouted at by.
However any other way of approaching
this would be forced for me. This is
my natural way – and probably why all those people urged me to start teaching
in the first place. We shall see soon enough.
My intention for this blog is not to make
it all about the politics of education and
potentially dry, academic debate, but just to open a window to it as
part of my life and thoughts, whims and musings.
Later,
Anna
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